Not so Bad
by X5898
Summary: In a moment of darkness, a letter brings Max some hope. No pairing.


**Disclaimer: **Not mine. Dark Angel belongs to Cameron and Eglee.   
**Summary: **In a moment of darkness, a letter brings Max some hope. No pairing.   
**A/N: **When I started writing this little fic, I had a writer for the letter in mind. In fact, it all started with the idea of said writer having things to say to the transgenics. When I finished the story, I realized that the writer in itself was not important, what really mattered were the words said on it. So I'm making the letter anonymous so each one of you can picture who the writer is according to your own imagination. There are some clues on the letter anyway, I couldn't help myself. 

**A/N 2: **Special thanks to Elle for her words of encouragement regarding this story. I can't thank you enough.

"**Not so Bad" by X5 898**

It was early morning and Max was walking through the outskirts of TC. She knew she shouldn't be there, someone might see her and it would cause a riot on the other side of the fence. But right now she didn't care; not that much anyway. She was having a very bad day and she really needed to get away from all the activity and noise at HQ and its surroundings. Causing a direct conflict with the human was surely not the way to make her day better, but no one was around at this early hour of the morning and she was confident her little misconduct would pass undetected.

This past two weeks had been really complicated for everyone in TC, but especially for her. After all, it had been her idea to stay and make a stand; now she had to face the consequences. Getting stuck inside TC with nowhere to turn, what a great idea that had been. It seemed the right thing to do at the time but now, two weeks later, she was having second thoughts about it. She already knew things would get tough, but every day that passed her by was getting harder and harder to face. And no matter how much she hated to admit it, she didn't expect the siege to end any time soon.

Everyone was trying to make the better out of the situation but things were doomed to explode sooner or later. For starters, Xs and transhumans weren't used to treat each other on a daily bases and problems between the two were starting to resurface. True, the first week, they had all being preoccupied with other stuff. Everyone working together, getting TC in shape to inhabit and establishing security all through out the city. Things were pretty calm; each side focused on their own task. But as things were getting done and TC was starting to run on its own, all that free time was making them restless. And bored transgenics meant conflict. And not only between Xs and transhumans; the Xs were also starting to question her skills and leadership. They wanted a CO in charge and not a supposed messiah. They didn't believe in hidden messages and cryptic runes, they believed in training and earned authority. And guess what? Apparently she hadn't earned hers.

To top it all, the conflict with the norms was getting worse by the day. The National Guard had arrived and with that, all opportunity to resolve the situation with the apparently friendly and down to Earth Detective Clemente, was gone. The National Guard had other orders and giving them a free passage to being respected citizens of Seattle wasn't one of them. And of course, White was having a blast manipulating popular opinion. Now that she really thought about it, she wasn't having a bad day, she was having a bad month. And what was really getting to her was that the month was far from over.

She looked down at her watch and it was late, way too late. She had been so deep in thought she hadn't realized the time. She should really start heading back; staying there for much longer would be tempting fate. And well, considering it wasn't on her side lately, she shouldn't be doing it.

Max was about to head back to HQ when her eyes picked something on the ground near the fence. A piece of paper. The only thing keeping it from flying away with the wind was a little stone holding it down. She had to admit there was still a lot of junk laying around at this part of TC, but this paper was still too white to be part of the city's usual inhabitants. She took a closer look and realized it was an envelope with the words "For you" written on it with a black pen. It had definitely come from the outside, if its location and general condition were any indication. She cursed silently. The fact that someone on the outside had managed to get so close to TC to leave that envelope and had passed completely undetected was just what her shitty day was lacking. Now she was pissed and someone would definitely face her rage. Probably Mole, he was after all in charge of security. It was his responsibility there was apparently none in this sector of TC. How could soldiers born and bred to be the best be so reckless? As if in answer to her question, she picked some movement at her right; two transhumans doing their rounds. She would get to the bottom of this later but now her curiosity had kicked in and she wanted to know what the letter was all about. So with the cat grace that was imprinted in her X5 DNA, she disappeared inconspicuously into an abandoned building close by. She didn't want to be disturbed by anyone right now.

Ok, so first thing's first. She sniffed the letter to check for explosives; but the only smells that reached her nostrils were that of paper and ink. So it wasn't a bomb, good. Her curiosity picked up even more and she could barely contain herself while she ripped the envelope open. The letter was also written with the same black pen as the envelope. The writing was weird. It was completely legible, but for some reason, Max found it impossible to conclude whether it was written by a male or a female. She began reading.

_Dear Transgenics:_

_You are probably wondering who I am? why am I writing this to you? Well, my name is not important, nor is my past or motivation. All you need to know about me is that I have valuable data; intel of extreme importance to your cause. Why am I giving it to you is not relevant, what's important is what you choose to do with the knowledge. With that out of the way, let me tell you a story. _

_I've heard some of you talking about people being afraid of what they don't understand. You are wondering how I found that out, well don't, I mean you no harm. But you are right in some way. People are terrified of the unknown. It takes that illusionary feeling of control over a world they have no control of. That scares them more than anything else and my race has always reacted in a violent way to their fear; sometimes to hide it, sometimes cause they can't face it. But that's not the only reason for your current situation. There is something else hidden behind their actions; something that's at the very core of their humanity. And that is envy. _

_Humans are flawed and they need each other to survive. History is in itself the journey of the human kind to overcome such flaws in our bodies and mind by knowledge, tools and machines. We need our creations and each other to survive day after day, for we can't do it alone. At the end of the journey, one goal: perfection. Yet, while our actions are guided by that unconscious seek for perfection, we know we can never achieve it. We are doomed to look for something more our entire lives, knowing it's what will make us whole and yet knowing beforehand that it's not in our destiny to reach it. Our lives are a constant journey of hope and frustration; and if there's something true about us is that we don't handle frustration very well. _

_But right about now, you are probably asking yourselves, what does any of this have to do with you. Everything. Think about your creation; what do you think was the reason behind it? Yes, it had to do with the idea of revved up soldiers who would be able to handle themselves better than ordinary soldiers in battle and by that, saving lives. But deep down, that was not the reason behind the scientists ideas and goals. They wanted to create perfection in you. If they couldn't reach it themselves, at least they would be involved in the creation of beings who could. You are humanity's ultimate legacy. If we have reached our limits of what we can accomplish and are traveling in a downward spiral towards extinction, then you are our sons, our legacy. You are the ones who can push the limit a little further. You are our dreams incarnated and don't let anyone tell you otherwise or put you down, cause you are now everything we'll never be able to be. _

_So this brings me to your next question. Why do we hate you when we should be admiring you? The answer: envy. As true as it is that we are always aiming to be better, the same can be said by the fact that we don't take it very well when someone is doing better than us on that quest. Just look at our history and the world today. People hate others when they are better than them, when they are happier than them, when they have more things than them. Mankind is in constant competition and, although that competition has achieved great things and breakthroughs in science and technology, is also in the core of what keeps us apart. We may admire others for what they have accomplished, yet the monster of jealousy is always there, hiding in the darkness waiting to come out. Some of us have control over it most of the time, enabling us to feel happy for others. But learning about you, so far up the food chain, even those with control over their feelings are having a hard time dealing. We admire you for we understand what you mean to our world, yet, it's hard for us to look at you. When we look at you and hear about you, we are faced with the very image of what we want to be and yet will never be able to be. It let us know the impossibility of our dreams and yet, how possible they are for you. That's were the hate comes from, that's the reason for the norms yelling outside your gate. It's the release of our frustrations by hating those who embody them. _

_How can you change this you ask? There is no way. It's not even your place to change it, it's not your fault. You just have to give us time. In time we will learn to cope and really see you for what you are. In time we will learn that your existence, far from the incarnation of our doomed dreams, is the incarnation of how far we've traveled and all we have achieved. Maybe we can't be perfect, maybe not even you guys can be, but we were able to create the opportunity for a new race to travel a little closer to our goal. We managed something so big and we will learn to be proud of that. Maybe with time we'd even be able to understand that perfection is overrated and reach true happiness with what we have._

_In the mean time, don't let people get to you with their hate. You are humans and no one can take that from you no matter how much they deny it. The difference is, you are better humans. Remember that and don't loose your hope in us. It's true we tend to repeat our mistakes time after time, but we are also able to learn from them and move on. Don't give up on us just yet._

_I hope this words helped you. As I said, I'm just an ally who is trying to do what's right for once._

_My respects soldiers, _

_A friend. _

When Max finished reading the letter there was a smile on her face. She couldn't pin point the exact moment it had reached her features, but it was there now. She didn't know who this person was and she should probably be worried for the breach in security that letter meant. Yet, for some reason she didn't. The letter had given her the peace she had so desperately being seeking lately. It wouldn't last, she knew that; too many things were happening in her life and this fight was far from over. But for now she was at peace and she was thankful for that. Hope was probably overrated, but right now it was exactly what she needed and she thanked this "friend" silently for planting the seed in her. Her future was uncertain, as was that of her family, but for some reason now it didn't felt as dark…

THE END

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A/N: Ok, I can't help it. I'm gonna tell you who I had in mind, but feel free to use your own imagination to come up with whoever you think could have written the letter. When I wrote it, I was thinking that the writer should be one of the scientists who created them trying to make peace with his conscience after everything he knew they put them through. When he joined the project, he was only thinking about the breakthrough in science it will mean. Now he understands the repercussions and wants to bring them a little hope as a way of apology.


End file.
